How to Avoid “Going to Court” When Getting Divorced
Most people getting divorced want to avoid going to Court. Technically, everyone must to “go to court” in Arizona to get a divorce. But it’s really not court people want to avoid, it’s litigation. Divorce litigation can be a lengthy, expensive, and stressful legal process of arguing your case in front of a judge. But if both parties are willing, there are many options to avoid “going to court.”
Options to Avoid “Going to Court” and Divorce Litigation
As mentioned above, a divorce must go through the court system. But how the final decisions are made is up to the parties. There are 2 ways to resolve a divorce; reaching an agreement or requesting the judge decide through a TrialA court hearing in which evidence and testimony are taken, and the Court makes a final determination of the issues raised in a petition. Trials and evidentiary hearings are somewhat synonymous, but the difference is one of scope: Evidentiary hearings are more limited in scope…Read more about Trial.
Ways to Reach an Agreement
Fortunately, there are a multitude of ways to reach an agreement in a divorce:
- Informal SettlementAn agreement by parties in a lawsuit to resolve the case without going to trial. This can be resolving all the issues or just a few of the issues. The issues resolved should be reduced into a written agreement that both parties sign and then submit to the Court for approval. This…Read more about Settlement Discussions. A good starting point for many couples is to start the discussion between themselves about the terms of their divorce. This is not ideal for all situations, as it really depends on the willingness to negotiate and settle the outstanding issues.
- Settlement Correspondence: One option is to send proposals back and forth to each other either via letter or email. Be aware that agreements that are in writing and signed by both parties can be binding agreements and email signatures can count as signatures.
- MediationA common settlement method where the parties use a mediator, a neutral third party, to negotiate a settlement. Family law mediations usually involve the mediator meeting separately with each party and their attorneys. Mediation is often highly effective.Read more about Mediation. This is where the parties work with a neutral third-PartyAn individual, entity, or the state that either brings the lawsuit or is required to respond to the lawsuit. See ARFLP Rule 3(f).Read more about Party professional to reach agreements. The mediator’s goal is to facilitate a productive discussion and work with the parties to create solutions. Mediation is usually very effective, particularly if you use a mediator who is a current practicing attorney or retired Family Court Judge.
- Collaborative Divorce. This is an alternative process within the Arizona Rules of Family Law Procedure that allows the parties, their attorneys, and other professionals to work together to craft solutions for how their divorce should look. Because it tends to be expensive (both parties must have an attorney) and high-risk (if you can’t reach an agreement, your attorneys must resign, and you must start over, including with DiscoveryGoverned by Rules 51 to 65 of the Arizona Rules of Family Law Procedure, this is the formal process of acquiring information that you need to put on your case. This includes options like interrogatories (written questions), depositions, subpoenas, and Requests for Productions.…Read more about Discovery and DisclosureFollowing Rule 49, this is when you provide documents, evidence, and information regarding your case to the other side. Any evidence you want to use must be disclosed to the other side. Disclosure is not filed with the court.Read more about Disclosure), it tends to be used primarily for high-asset divorces.
Deadline to Reach an Agreement
Ideally, to avoid Court altogether, the parties must come to an agreement within the first couple of months of the Petition for DissolutionA document that starts a case to end a marriage, i.e., the paperwork that starts the divorce.Read more about Petition for Dissolution being filed and served. If the RespondentThis term refers to the person or party on the receiving side of the original lawsuit. Defined in the rule as “any opposing party other than the petitioner.” ARFLP Rule 3(f)(2). See also Petitioner.Read more about Respondent files a Response to the PetitionThis is a court document that someone files to start a case.Read more about Petition, the Court will typically set an initial hearing within a few months. If a Response is not filed within 120-days, the Court will send a notice that it intends to dismiss your case. This creates a bit of a time crunch when trying to avoid court.
If you wait to file the Petition for Dissolution, you have more control over the time to reach agreements. Many people go through the SettlementAn agreement by parties in a lawsuit to resolve the case without going to trial. This can be resolving all the issues or just a few of the issues. The issues resolved should be reduced into a written agreement that both parties sign and then submit to the Court for approval. This…Read more about Settlement process before they file. But keep in mind, once you file and serve the divorce papers, you must wait 60-days before your divorce can be finalized.
Top 5 Tips to Successfully Avoid Court During Divorce
- Be reasonable.
- Know the issues (including the finances).
- Be willing to negotiate.
- Know what you want.
- Focus on the end game.





